Howard McCrary

 LETTERS FROM THE HEART 

LETTERS FROM THE HEART ARE REAL STORIES THAT HAPPENED TO REAL PEOPLE, I HOPE EVERYONE CAN BENIFIT FROM THEIR EXPENIENCES. 

I BELIEVE UNTIL YOU CAN PRACTICE MEDITATION ON A DAILY BASIS, YOU CANNOT BEGIN TO KNOW THE VALUE OF WHAT IT COULD DO FOR YOUR LIFE.

THE PAST IS WHAT IT IS .... THE PAST. WE SHOULD BE ABLE TO LEARN FROM OUR MISTAKES AND NOT TO REPEAT THEM.

BEFORE I CAME INTO THE LIGHT AND WISDOM OF MEDITATION, I MADE CERTAIN DECISIONS THAT I STILL AM RESPONSIBLE FOR TODAY.

MY LIFE NOW IS DEDICATED TO THE CAUSE OF WORLD PEACE. I THOUGHT THAT BECAUSE OF MY PROBLEMS I COULD NEVER BE A SPOKES PERSON FOR WORLD PEACE. BUT NOW I KNOW THAT FOR THE REASON OF MY PROBLEMS I WAS CHOSEN. I DO MY BEST TO FILL THE REMAINING DAYS OF MY LIFE ON EARTH WITH MERITS AND GOOD DEEDS. THE WORLD IS FILLED WITH PEOPLE WITH PROBLEMS, SO I TRY TO SHARE AT LEAST A SMILE WITH OTHERS EACH DAY.

NOW I AM IN LOVING KINDNESS ADDRESSING MY PAST ACTIONS IN WISDOM AND IN LOVE FOR THE FUTURE.

THANK YOU FOR READING.

This is a story I would like to share with everyone from my heart.

When one is not where he should be spiritually his level of awareness is lowered. This is why I value my practice in meditation. It raises our moral standard as well as allows you to be aware of the intentions of others.

There was a man first met a very lovely Christian young lady that the man was very happy to see her interest in joining their choir at a  Church many years ago.

The man had very little self respect when he met her. She was not aware of that. She merely saw a man with a talent. It takes a lot more than just talent to be a self respecting human being.

So eventually after faithfully attending several choir rehearsals, she asked for a private voice lesson.

Everyone has a past and through meditation we can know that knowledge of one's past. This man did not have this ability of inner knowledge at the time he met her.

When she invited him to the place where she lived and worked for him to receive payment for giving her the voice lesson, he was still unaware of the complications that would follow.

This young lady was attractive but the man did not know her past nor was he concerned with it. He just accepted her at face value. His curiosity overruled his ability to reason.

If he had the spiritual insight, knowledge, wisdom and integrity at that time, then he would not have considered being unfaithful to his wife for someone he hardly knew.

The neglect created in his present marriage due to his past guilt from his former marriage led to his isolation and mental promiscuity that was already taking effect when they met. To commit an act of adultery in one's mind is as real as the act itself.

They fell to temptation and developed an affair. After few weeks the young lady asked him if he would leave his wife and he could not even though they were distant in their marriage relationship and the young lady said " then I think we should see other people ".

The man agreed because he was not going to leave his wife and two sons and he felt it was unfair to her as a young lady to keep her tied to an affair that had no future and it was a morally correct conclusion.

When they parted he went on with his life for 3 months until he happened to call her to see how she was doing, and she told him "We are having a baby !"

The man came home and he had to go to minister with an Evangelist, he knew this was the end of his Christian ministry and reputation in the Christian community.

He replayed the phone conversation from her hundreds of times in his head and thinking when and how he was going to tell his wife the truth. He was in such despair that he felt he had only one choice. He went to the nearest convenience store and purchased the largest bottle of Tylenol available.

As he sat in his hotel room with a glass of water and a hand full of his answer to his pain...and his phone rang.

It was a prophet he only met once in his life and happen to give him his business card at hotel. The prophet said," God told me to call you and tell you to stop what you are doing right now!"

The man broke down in tears as the prophet continued, ?God has not forgotten you and what you see now as an insurmountable problem will ultimately bring God glory. Your life is not yours to take. God has a special plan for your life that you can't even imagine!"

When the man told the prophet of his circumstance, the prophet was the one that said let the child be born and he will be his Godfather. The prophet stopped the man from committing suicide that night.

So the man continued on with his life and confessed to his wife everything that happened, his wife was deeply hurt and asked him to leave...and sadly he did. 

The man went on, found another place to live and only supported the young lady morally and financially with hope reconciliation will his wife and family. He paid for the young lady's apartment of her choice until he could not afford the payment after six months and helped her to move into her uncle's home. He paid for her clothes and food during her term of pregnancy, he was there when the baby was born and he signed that day the papers stating that he was his legal father and supported her for over a year and a half until he left for a performance in other country. Before leaving, he asked his wife if there was any chance of reconciliation and she said there was no possible way ever again.

When you entertain temptation you must ask yourself the question, "How much does it cost?"

When the man had a moment of clarity in other country he began to think about what the yound lady said about, "we should see other people" before they separated for three months, and why she had him to sign another document saying that he would never see this child or contact the mother or her family for the rest of his life.

Because he was uncertain of the paternity, and was not making the same amount of money he made previously when the child was born, and knowing that payment to her would continue until he pay all the charges and cleared up the past payments due. He  decided to stop the support until he could find out for sure if he was the father or not.

The man took a DNA test and when he sent his results to his attorney, his attorney told him that his case was overruled by Government and because he had supported the child and the mother so whether he was his father or not he must continue to pay child support because the child was declared legally retarded.

When his attorney told him this news, it changed his heart to think about the child and not what is true or false. 

In the best interest of the child, he agreed and is presently working with a social worker to pay all the arrears charged.

Now the man will be responsible for the child the action is already in progress. Presently the man gives most of his income to support his children and his elderly parents. 

The man is now hoping that the young lady will read this letter because he was not allowed to contact her, and he wants the young lady to know that he had a change of heart and he is willing now to be responsible for his actions.

Now the question is about the young lady. Providing that he does what it required as the legal parent of this child will she still harbor unforgiveness in her heart?

He is not resentful or angry at her. He forgives her for the derogatory she has said about him and the threats she made against him and his family. He has grown considerably through meditation. He is not the same man she remembers.

Meditation can help us. Let go of the past. There is only bitterness and anger there.

This letter is written in loving kindness to let everyone know it is better to let go of hatred, bitterness and resentment than to keep it festering in our hearts.

Everyone should do their part to be responsible for their past... and everyone should do all that is necessary to be responsible for their future.

No one escapes the law of Karma, it is fair.

In love,

Howard